Where Does All the Pressure Around Parenthood Come From?

Mar 09, 2024

The pressure you’re feeling to make a decision about parenthood can be self-imposed, or come from external factors — ranging from antsy parents and in-laws to the so-called biological clock. 

The pressure can be real or imagined. 

It can be very difficult to untangle the knots caused by pressure, as self-imposed pressures can mix with internalized messages from partners, parents, and others, says Ann Davidman, Parenthood Clarity Mentor of more than 30 years.

And then there’s judgment. Deciding not to have children can be a big deal in a society that still clings to messages such as: 

  • “Having a child is your duty.”
  • “The only acceptable reason not to have children is infertility.”
  • “People have been having children since time began!” 

People have also, of course, not been having children! By choice. 

Yet, the subject of having children (or not) arouses strong feelings even from people who seldom have opinions on anything, because it can intersect with their ideas about right and wrong. 

It can be hard to keep your sense of perspective and not succumb to societal pressure when you’re essentially being assaulted with messages that bring with them the baggage of shame. 

You can feel compelled to pretend you want to be a parent even if you don’t. Feeling that pressure can keep you stuck in the state of secretly hoping that your desire to be a parent will suddenly appear, believing that will relieve the pressure.

There are few topics as emotionally charged as this one, and it’s one of the many reasons Ann created her proven decision-making process many years ago.

Now you’re invited to be part of Ann’s judgment-free community when you join her Motherhood Clarity Course and Fatherhood Clarity Course. (You can sign up for our waitlist to get notified when the next course opens).

As your mentor, Ann will guide you, step-by-step, to (finally!) arrive at the confident clarity you desire and deserve.