Many things can go into your ambivalence or anxiety about having children: Fear of pregnancy, fear of giving birth, debt, etc. And if I told you to put those issues aside as if they were of no consequence, you’d think I was out of my mind.

Now that you know you have a choice between motherhood or childfree, do you know how to make that choice?

Just because someone’s life doesn’t look like yours and you are happy with your life doesn’t mean they don’t have a good life. What makes a good life is your relationship with yourself and with your life.

Dear Invisible Population, I know you’re out there. I know you’re hiding, hoping that no one will find out that you don’t know if you want to be a mom or live a childfree life.