Making A Resolution With Clarity

motherhood parenthood resources Jan 14, 2017

Do you make New Year's resolutions? What is a resolution? The exact definition is: "a firm decision to do or not to do something."

With this definition, I would say you can’t make a resolution unless you know what you want and why. Just making a declaration without knowing what you want and why sets you up for what I call “the hope and pray” method. It’s ineffective.

Here's an example: I play tennis. I hear people declare all the time that this year they’re going to improve their game or raise their tennis rating. I believe them when they say it. I know they really, really want to play better. However, it’s one thing to want to play better, and it's another thing to do what you have to do in order to be better. Making a declaration doesn’t just make something happen.

What do you want to happen this year? Do you want to finally decide about motherhood and if so, why?

The why is key.

If you want to decide because you think you SHOULD because your friends have already decided or there’s pressure to decide because of your age or your relationship might come to an end, that would make it difficult to succeed in your resolution. You have to want to decide for you.

Do you want to know your truth? If yes, then you’re more likely to succeed. Facing why you want to know will make it much easier to actually discover the answer once and for all.

Be honest with yourself. Sometimes the best we can do is know what we want to want. That might be more honest. For example, “I want to want to put an end to indecision but really have no idea how to do that.” If that’s the best you can come up with then that’s pretty darn good. That is honest. You are likely to succeed with that kind of truth. Or it might be:

  • “I wish I didn’t have to figure this out now but I do or my relationship will end for sure.”

  • “I really thought I’d know by now.”

  • “If I keep waiting the decision will be made for me and I really don’t want that but I feel stuck and completely immobilized.”

There is help. There is immediate help. I ask you to consider one of the following three options:

  1. Join the Online Group Motherhood Clarity Course. Join me and your peers for a 4-month course as I guide you step-by-step through the book. You'll discover your true desire: to be a mom or live a childfree life.

  2. Buy the book Motherhood-Is It For Me? Your Step-by-Step Guide to Clarity. Work through the program at your own pace. Do it by yourself or, if you’re feeling isolated, do it with a friend or a group of friends.

  3. Work with me one-on-one to dive deep into what has kept you from being able to decide so that you can know what you truly want for yourself so that you can make a confident decision.

I will help you turn over every stone that needs to be looked under so that you can finally move forward in your life.